What if you could transform every failure to success? Turn your most disappointing mistakes into overwhelming accomplishments? What if you could learn to move on, to leave those missteps and difficulties behind you, and open a whole new world of discovery and achievement?
You can, and I’m going to support you.
We’ve recently talked about the Essence of Success, and how Integrity works to build trust and advance our leadership roles so we can show up and make a difference. When we talk about integrity, we’re talking about holding your shape, standing in your power, being as strong as steel, and not letting anyone or anything pull you off center.
But how can you have integrity with yourself and others, 100% of the time, when you feel you have failed? Or when failures of the past keep coming up and blocking your way?
It’s time you graduated with your PhD in Failure and headed back to Kindergarten.
Go from Failure to Success, with a PhD
No matter where you feel that you’ve failed, one thing’s for sure: You have gone over and over it in your head, you have rotated it this way and that, you have replayed the tape…you know the material. You may have even shamed yourself or blamed others.
That’s all in the past now.
You know your failure (or what you call a “failure”) so well that you have earned your PhD in the subject. You would pass the final with flying colors—graduate first in your class.
But the piece you may be missing is this: It’s customary, when you graduate (especially after you’ve performed so well), to move on.
So let’s move on.
A Graduation Exercise
I first want you to write down three things you’ve accomplished in your life that feel successful. These can relate to your personal or business life.
After you finish that, write down three things you’ve had trouble with. Maybe you see them as failures, or simply as things you have not yet accomplished. Again, they can be part of your personal or business life.
Take note of how you felt while writing in both categories.
Now circle the failure you feel is the most significant. It could be something you keep trying and failing to achieve, or it can be something you have failed to try. It can even be something you’re waiting for and have not yet received.
It’s time to look at that failure in a new light. It is your most successful failure. You are a master at that failure. You have a PhD in that failure. There is nothing more to learn. People come from all around the world to sit at your feet to learn how to do that. You’re excellent at not achieving it. You are massively successful at failing at that. You have nowhere to go; you’re done; you’re a master; you’re complete.
And so, the only thing left to do is go back to Kindergarten—to be a novice…a fresh-faced learner.
The aim of this exercise is to notice how it feels to say that you’re a success, with a PhD, in that failure. You should be bored with that now; there’s nothing more to do.
You no longer have to suffer under the weight of that failure. Your open, innocent mind is ready to absorb new knowledge. You will have compassion for yourself and be patient with yourself as you learn. Just as a child does not criticize herself for coloring outside the lines, or for not knowing something, you can now see the world as a kaleidoscope of new and exciting opportunities.
Turning Failure to Success is Integrity in Action
When you fully adopt the belief that Integrity is the Essence of Success, then you will never hold onto a failure, or allow it to hold you back, again.
That’s because if you are operating with 100% integrity, 100% of the time, you will not dwell on failure. By choosing something different than what wasn’t working, you are exercising integrity. You are standing as strong as steel in your values, and you’re not allowing those failures to pull you off your center.
Pulling it All Together
Now that you have a better understanding of Integrity as the Essence of Success and how you can reframe failures to feel like successes (so you can move forward as a learner), you might be wondering…
How can I exercise integrity in all I do? So I can experience the Essence of Success?
Funny you should ask. That’s precisely what I’ll be covering in my next blog installment, An Integrity Checklist for Success. You will get the chance to look at every area of your life, to make sure you’re showing up with integrity—because only when you do that can you move toward the success you desire.
So until then, frame those Failure PhDs in your mind, hang them on your figurative Accomplishment Wall. Reframe them as successes. And go back to Kindergarten, to learn and grow as a novice who seamlessly moves from failure to success. And know that you don’t have to do this alone. If you’re hungering for support from others who are striving for 100% integrity, 100% of the time, take a few minutes to learn about the Conscious Leadership Academy’s freebies and upcoming events.
