Are you relationship material? Are you a “catch?” And are you ready to find and to be “the one”?
There is a fairly simple way to find out, and it begins with paying attention to why you say, “I love you” to someone you care for. What do you expect to get from sharing those three little words?
If you’re not sure, think about this scenario: Your loved one (real or imagined) is leaving for work, and you call out, “I love you!” He or she waves and smiles, but does not answer.
How does this make you feel?
- Happy, because it’s important to let them know how I feel.
- Puzzled because they didn’t say it to me. Maybe they didn’t hear me?
- Convinced that the relationship is over. I am unlovable.
If you do not feel like a whole, autonomous person who loves themselves, who feels worthy of love, and who does not need another person’s love to complete them, then you might search for “proof” that you are lovable. You might say “I love you” simply to hear another person repeat it to you. If telling someone “I love you” isn’t enough—if you find yourself saying it only to hear it said in return—then you are not Orbiting in Love. You are relying on another human being to prove to you that you’re worthy—and that’s not their job.
You are not a fragment of a person. You are perfect, innocent, and lovable…just the way you are.
This is important to understand, not only for your own autonomy, but for the sake of those whom you share your life with.
If you’re bringing someone into your life to prove to yourself that you are lovable, you’re placing immeasurable pressure on that person. No one—it doesn’t matter how selfless or doting—can love you enough to prove that you’re worthy of it. It’s an impossible task. It might start out well, with this person working overtime to make you feel good enough and deserving of the love they have to give…but it won’t be long before they find themselves exhausted, frustrated. And they will quit, because nothing they’re doing is making a difference. They will give up trying to make you feel better. They will fall out of love. It’s just too hard, because perhaps they also have a need to fill.
The truth is they never would have made a difference. They never would have been successful in teaching you that you’re enough. That’s because NO ONE can prove that you’re worthy of love except YOU.
When you are Orbiting in Love, you are existing in a state of being in which you believe you are perfect, you are innocent, you are whole, and you are ENOUGH.
Only then can you have a relationship with another whole and complete person. And only then can magic happen between two people who are both “relationship material.”
When you’re Orbiting in Love, you are Relationship Material
Think back to all the friends you grew up with, or your siblings…all the people who either ended up in long-term relationships or who are still searching for that special someone.
At some point in your life, you may have believed that the people who are the loneliest, or who had the most grandiose thoughts about Happily Ever After were “relationship material.” After all, they were the ones who wanted it the most, right?
And as you grew with these people, you may have noticed that the ones who seemed to need the validation of a relationship the most were the same people who’ve had trouble keeping it together.
Why is that?
When a person searches for someone to “complete them” or to be their “better half,” they are declaring that they’re not a whole person on their own. They believe they cannot live alone because they’re not enough. And so, they look for that validation from others.
And like I mentioned earlier, the “others” get tired.
If you can identify with any of this, it’s time to rethink what we mean when we talk about “relationship material.”
When you are Orbiting in Love, you have your own path on which you’re traveling. You circle along your orbit, of your own power and without anyone else having to bridge gaps for you. It’s pretty smooth sailing, really. And as you’re gliding along, your BubbleTalk is saying “I am lovable, I am wanted, I am perfect just the way I am, and I love myself.” And because these are your subconscious thoughts, they are what you actually believe. They are driving you around and around in that orbit of love.
And that, my friend, is what makes you true “relationship material.” It’s not about needing someone in your life; it’s about being attractive because you already have everything you need.
And guess what? When you are Orbiting in Love, you will only attract others who are also Orbiting in Love…which brings me to the phenomenon of 1+1=3.
1+1=3: The Orbiting in Love Equation
One is a whole number. It’s not a fraction. It is complete and can stand alone without having to be multiplied or added to for the purpose of being made whole.
Only when you are Orbiting in Love (the true meaning of “relationship material”) can you be that whole, complete figure that stands upright of your own power and love.
Now, you might think that once you start attracting others who are Orbiting in Love, you can count on the sum being two, because you’re together. Or, you might even rely on the “two of you becoming one” philosophy, because maybe that’s what you’ve been taught. Neither of these equations represent what should happen—or what really happens—when two whole, complete people who are Orbiting in Love come together.
It’s a magical equation, really. 1+1=3 represents the idea that when two loved people come together, the sum of what they create is greater than anything they could create alone. When two loving orbits intersect, a surge of synergy is experienced, and something happens that can only be described as magic.
There will be You, Him/Her, and together there will be a separate entity called Us. And when neither of you is relying on the other to prove lovability, or worthiness, you will truly understand the power of three.
You CAN be Relationship Material
No one should ever resign to the belief that they aren’t, and never will be, relationship material. You were born innocent, perfect and lovable—and back when you were a baby, you had no problem believing that and receiving love that was freely given by others.
You’ve just got to get back to that place, where you were naturally Orbiting in Love. It can happen, and you should believe it will, when you have the unconditional support of a global community of conscious leaders empowering others to create a win/win world. You can find that in the Conscious Leadership Academy, Essence of Relationships module. Visit essenceofbeing.com/relationships now to find out about the freebies available to you, upcoming One-Day Events, and all the ways Essence of Relationships is working to develop your relationship with self, others, and God, The Universe, or Great Spirit. You’ve got this! You have everything it takes to be relationship material…and we’re here to show you how.
