“But I did not have a choice!” Have you ever said or thought that? Have you felt like you cannot change things and you had no choice? Or have you made a choice and regretted it and beat your self up? Felt guilty for your choices?
If someone wrongs you, you could blame them for the act and say “they did that to me.” Or you could shame yourself and say “It’s my fault.” Or you could justify your position and say “they always do that kind of thing and I am right to retaliate.” These reactions are what I call below the line behavior and give your power away. You cannot make a change from any of those points of view because you are vibrating as a victim.
If you blame someone for something, you give your power away and energetically say, “I am powerless to do anything about it because it is not my fault.” If you shame yourself for something, you are giving your power away by energetically saying, “I am to blame and I feel guilty.” Remember, guilt demands punishment and you will continue to self-sabotage or attract someone to punish you energetically. If you justify your position or make excuses, you are still blaming and giving your power away to the circumstance and still vibrating as a victim.
Below the line behavior wastes time because nothing changes. We resort to BMW! Bitch, Moan, and Whine! All the while nothing changes and yet you are the common denominator.
The only way to make a change and have freedom of the endless cycle of blame, guilt, and shame is to take responsibility and ask yourself, “How did I co-create this situation?” “How can I change it next time?” This is above the line behavior and is energetically the only way to shift out of creating the same events over and over.
If you take responsibility for your actions, thoughts, and beliefs, you can make a change. You are not responsible for other people’s actions, thoughts, or beliefs. Only yours. Responsibility can mean FREEDOM to create a better life and not be stuck in the same pattern.
Once you change your beliefs, your outside world will be different and you will create a new pattern. Instead of reacting and saying things you do not mean, blaming others, shaming yourself, or justifying your limitations, you can respond in a way that gives you the freedom to change. You always have a choice.
