According to The Normal Bar, the world’s most extensive survey about all things love, trust is an issue for a majority of us. In a poll of over 100,000 people collecting 1 million data points, researchers found that 53 percent of men trust their partners while only 39 percent of women say the same. The data showed that even in good relationships, trust is shaky.
And yet, in order to navigate our daily lives, we have to trust others, many of whom are strangers. Without trusting others to do their jobs, we wouldn’t get in our car and drive on the highway, or get on an airplane.
So why do we have such a hard time trusting in our interpersonal relationships? Could it be because we have expectations of how people should behave? When people fail to meet our expectations, our trust is broken. When someone close to you acts in a way you never thought possible, it may make you question everyone and everything; the things you once believed with conviction, the very nature of human interaction. But in reality, perhaps you feel it’s you who can’t be trusted to discern where to place your trust in the first place.
If we want to trust others, first we have to trust ourselves. We often see what we want to see. Have there been times in your relationships that you’ve ignored potential red flags? Turned a blind eye to behavior you knew was not in integrity? Conversely, do you perhaps misinterpret a loved one’s actions as distrustful because you have filtered it through your core wounds? Often, we project scenarios from our past onto our present. If we want to be able to trust others, we need first, to have confidence in our own ability to take care of ourselves.
So how do we discern? How do we learn to trust ourselves and our decisions? One of the best ways is to ask your body. When faced with a decision, hold each choice in your mind. Then listen to your heart. Become still. Breathe. You will feel the answer, often in your solar plexus. A stirring, a vibration palpable when holding the Divine answer in mind. Your inner guidance system knows. You can then use this technique when discerning whether someone is acting in integrity with you. Go to your center and listen.
You can also use kinesiology to get a “yes” or “no.” Think of the person or the question and then while standing still, close your eyes & if you lean forward, that is a “yes” and if you lean backwards, that is a “no.” Trusting our intuition is fuzzy sometimes. How do we discern if we are getting the right answers or are we feeling afraid & just say no? In other words, say you want to be with someone & you go within yourself & ask are they trustworthy? If you feel a tickle in your tummy & your head says NO, how do you know if that is fear talking or intuition talking?
Your intention is always right. You can know most of the time by asking the question “Is this person trustworthy” & “Is it in my highest good to…?” If you get a knowing in your mind then that is intuition. If you get a feeling in your gut, that could be fear.
If you are empathic, your intuition will come through your feelings and if you are a claire-savant (you receive info as a knowing), you will get answers in your mind. When in doubt about trusting, just use this saying & affirm “Trust & allow & don’t ask how!” Trusting is an allowing & it opens a vortex for you. Whether you are trusting yourself, others, or the Universe, you can set your intention to attract trustworthy people, trust your inner knowing, and trust the Universal Divine Spirit to bring you the perfect lesson.
